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Seventeen-year-old Micah Oliver doesn’t have time to get involved why doesn’t she have time? Use this opportunity to let us know something about her. with one boy, let alone two. But when the McAlister twins move to town, that’s exactly what happens. I felt like the last half of this sentence let me down. Like you went with the too obvious choice. Maybe instead, try something that gives us a hint of what’s going to happen while staying away from cliches like “her life will change forever.”
Logan’s lost three months of memories, and while no one will tell him what happened the night he lost those memories, it was bad enough to move his family across the country. But the secret Logan can’t remember is the one Luke can’t forget. And Luke doesn’t want Logan to remember – the truth of what really happened the night Logan’s girlfriend died would destroy them both. There’s a lot of info and innuendo here, but I feel like it lacks punch and emotion. I’m going to take a stab at a rewrite:
Logan remembers nothing about the night his girlfriend died. Not even his twin brother, Luke, will tell him what happened, but it was terrible enough for his family to uproot and move clear across the country.
The secret Logan can’t remember is the one Luke will never forget. [maybe something about him meeting/falling for Micah] Luke prays [or something more appropriate to his character] Logan never regains those memories, because the truth of that night would destroy his family.
But when Logan’s memories start to return, Luke knows it’s time to face the truth – even if it means losing Micah in the process.
Micah, Logan, and Luke are about to learn there’s only so far you can run before the truth catches up with you.
RECLAIMED is a contemporary young-adult novel, complete at 82,000 words, and told from alternating points of view of the three teens.
This sounds really interesting, but I’m still a little confused about how Micah fits in. Right now, she just kinda feels like a prop.
Also, I wanted to point out that three POVs is hard to sell in YA right now. I’m not saying it can’t be done or that you won’t do it, I just want to let you know you’re fighting an uphill battle – so you can be prepared for that.
Readers, please add your comments and suggestions down below!
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